From the Window of a Bus

1. I watched some pudgy salesman-type dash across the Phibbs Exchange trying to catch his bus, miss it, run back across the exchange to try and catch it as it came around to the exit despite the plethora of signs stating emphatically "buses only pick up passengers at designated stops." When it didn't stop for him I watched him curse, run across the exchange again, miss another bus, then run to the bus I was on and get on. He was winded from this headless chicken imitation he just performed. When he caught his breath he made a cell-phone call to "touch base" and blame his tardiness on bridge traffic.
2. I watched dawn over the Burrard Inlet. It was spectacular. Because it is cold today the steam from the various mills and refineries was ascending hundreds of metres into the air before dissipating. The columns of steam were backlit by the sun and set against blue-green sky and orange-yellow clouds. I wish I had brought my camera.
3. Watched some guy wearing a suit and driving a little red Honda make a serious testicular adjustment while stopped right beside the bus (what was he thinking?)
4. Watched some guy in a doorway on Powell St. near my old apartment shooting heroin into his ankle
5. Admired the irony of all the crack-heads sitting against the wall at Pigeon Park because the city repainted the benches last night. A fine example of sweeping dirt under the carpet.

Reptard's Rebuttal

From: "Purple Crow" <reptoid@hotmail.com>
Date: Mon Feb 25, 2002 4:25 pm
Subject: TO: Kim McCann, Michael Barrick and Michelle M. (look Mom, no "VON")


I know you're here, so I know you'll get this... well, you know what I mean. I know you'll READ it anyway... LMAO :D Whether you "get it" or not remains to be seen.

"You might find this difficult to believe, but... skepticism is boring. No, seriously. Consider this fact...
If you are a true skeptic, eventually you'll become skeptical of skepticism... of course, you'll have to prove it to yourself first - what could be more boring than that?"

:D ;) (Bugs Bunny kisses for all my critics) *smack*


Love,
Reptoid. (Yes, I am making fun of your consciousness or lack thereof)
--------
http://geocities.com/Reptoid_27

Geez! That's it? I was hoping for something less pathetic and more amusing .

For Kim

From Society of Environmental Toxicologists and Chemists newsletter:

What most people don't know about bread:
1. More than 98% of convicted felons are bread users
2. Fully HALF of children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked at home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were high; many women died in childbirth and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever and influenza ravaged whole nations.
4. More than 90% of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough". It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average American eats more bread than that in one month!
6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's and osteoporosis.
7. Bread has been proved to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after as little as two days.
8. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter and even cold cuts.
9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90% water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.
10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.
11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
12. Most American bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.

Not to mention:

At last, the "Report"

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