All things being equal

I'd rather just bag work and sort out the apartment today. I like it here. I had my cam open most the day yesterday just so I could look at the apartment.

The Fitness World people across the street remind me of gerbils. I don't need to get rodents again, now I have a whole row of humans in a glass box running on their wheels. Honestly, if these people had any idea how stupid they look would they still do it? I want to make signs to hold up in the window:

You look like gerbils

Sidewalks are free.

You need a better bra.

Run faster. You aren't getting any closer.

You're still fat, but now you look stupid, too.

Any suggestions for more?