New improved suckage

Actually today hasn't been so bad. They had the quarterly Internet Development Group (IDG) meeting today and that means half the day was nothing but sitting in a boardroom eating doughnuts, drinking coffee and trying not to fall asleep. It's pathetic though. I feel like that guy in "Office Space" - I'm just trying to kill eight hours every day. Two more to go right now...

Wiggers!

Bwaaaahahahaha!

I only get about 25,000 of these...

...and there goes another one. Another day down the toilet. I was pleased about just marking time at work. The patheticness of this is not lost on me. But I am forming a plan. I will not be doing this forever. With an end (meaning both a finish point and a purpose) in sight I'll make it.

I need to get out of this computer shit. I don't mind fooling around for fun, like this, for example, but working all day on boring computer shit and then coming home to new and equally boring computer shit (like having to fix a corruption in the Gothic BC photo database or annoying requests from my other clients and random nitwits that can't figure things out for themselves). I want this thing to go back to being a toy, not a job. I want an old fashioned ma-and-pop business not unlike my father's upholstery shop. I want to plant at least one foot firmly in the 19th century and leave it there.

Welcome to my process

Tristen

So this is how it works with me:

1. I get depressed about some aspect of my life.
2. Then I get mad at everything for not being the way I want it.
3. Then I dig around in my old stuff and find old things I did that I like.
4. Then I get mad at myself for letting whatever is going wrong happen.
5. Then I do something about it.

Yesterday I was moving from 2 to 3. I'm somewhere between 3 and 4 right now. This is a drawing I did in 1989. I stopped doing pencil crayon drawings when I started going to SFU. It was hard enough justifying painting to the theory-choked post-modern ultra-pretentious fuckheads I had to deal with. It's taken me years to get over art-school. Why did I let myself be influenced by people who couldn't even determine the mortality of Socrates from "All men are mortal" and "Socrates is a man" because they would be too caught up in protesting the "problematic" nature of the Eurocentricity of the reference to Classical Greece, the gender bias of the word "men" and the "problematic" nature of logic as a patriarchal construct as it was applied to the systematic oppression of "the other" in 19th century imperial colonialism? And if you think am exaggerating, you haven't been to art school.

I think I will invest in a nice box of Prismacolors when I get paid.