Cold Feet?

Dec. 30th, 2001 10:13 am
mbarrick: (Default)
[personal profile] mbarrick
OK, I am starting to freak out. I don't know if I want to be married again. Ivana's parents are insane and I am going to have her father living in the basement. Her mother does nothing but meddle. Ivana's kids are great, but they come with their own problems, most notably their biological father. That and the fact that Connor is the frail, sickly sort. I don't know how capable I am to working around someone who is sensitive to dust and chemicals. Commuting from North Van is not a thrilling prospect. Ack. Have I already become too old and set in my ways to adjust to this kind of change?

And then there is what is bothering me more than anything else: Ivana hasn't gotten the ring sized yet. She's not actually wearing it. That really disturbs me.

Then there are the clubs. I know I can't be a club kid forever, but I miss going out as much as I used to. I can see things that bothered me when I was with Dianna starting to happen with Ivana and I'm afraid I may be setting myself up for the same kind of misery again.

I'm afraid there is a sick part of me that wants to be miserable, that is setting me up to be dumped agian just for an excuse to get so blind drunk every Saturday that Sunday disappears entirely.

I'm really scared I might be making a horrible mistake for everyone involved.

Date: 2001-12-30 11:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] keki.livejournal.com
you sure it's not cold feet early and nothing more? i'm not sure how long you've been dating her but what about living together as a temp thing to see how it goes for awhile? if you're doubting aspects of daily life that come along with a union with her, you may need to try it out before jumping right in. look at it this way.. regardless of the outcome, you're aware of what may be a problem NOW rather than after the fact. Love can conquer all, or so they say.... but seriously, you shouldn't go into a marriage with any doubts at all, ya know? And talk to her about the ring... let her know how you feel, at least in that aspect. Who knows, maybe she's not ready either.

We talked

Date: 2001-12-31 11:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mbarrick.livejournal.com
She's taking the ring in on Wednesday.

Date: 2001-12-30 11:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] evilyn13.livejournal.com
just because you are engaged doesn't mean the wedding is going to be tomorrow... you should really slow things down for now, i mean moving in with her and the kids will definetley take some adjusting, so just take it one little step at a time now. put the wedding on hold for a while so you can adjust comfortabley to everything else that is happening.
just my thoughts
evilyn

Good advice

Date: 2001-12-31 11:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mbarrick.livejournal.com
Yes. We're just moving in together. I need to relax. One step at a time...
(deleted comment)

You're absolutely right

Date: 2001-12-31 11:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mbarrick.livejournal.com
Almost without exception, when I have problems in my life they simply come from not facing the things I am afraid of.

Date: 2001-12-30 07:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sleeplessknight.livejournal.com
I feel like I want to do everything in my power to help but I have no advice for you. Sorry. v_v;

Actually, considering my lack of experience with relationships I should be the last person to give you any advice.

But I will say good luck. I really hope things fall in place and go well for you.

*I was about to write 'hugs' but I suddenly realised I'm writing this out to a guy so instead I'll say 'firm handshake'*
Argh, I'm such a goof... ~_~*

LOL

Date: 2001-12-31 11:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mbarrick.livejournal.com
How about *manly hugs*? You know, the thump-on-the-back type?

But it is all good now. We talked about everything. For example, her dad is not going to be allowed to "fix" anything in our part of the house.
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